Kako se ne brinuti? How not to worry?

Puno je mudrosti i životnog iskustva utkano u narodnu poslovicu “Samo se ne sekiraj”. Možda često dobijete takav savjet od drugih, i onda se zapitate odakle im pravo da vam to govore, i da vas ne podržavaju u vašoj brizi. Ili možda u sebi pomislite, kako vas ne razumiju, i da zapravo uopšte nisu suosjećajni.

No, ovaj mudri savjet koji obično dobijemo od starijih i iskusnijih od nas sami zapravo predstavlja univerzalnu istinu-da brigom ne mrdamo sa mjesta na kojem smo se našli. I ne samo to, nego progresivno radimo protiv sebe na svim nivoima, počevši od tjelesnog (hormoni stresa koje sami proizvodimo zato što brinemo dodatno oslabljuju naš imunološki sistem) pa do emocionalnog i duhovnog nivoa.

Šta je zapravo briga?

Briga je najgori mogući način na koji koristimo jednu fenomenalnu mogućnost koja je svojstvena samo ljudskim bićima-mogućnost da maštamo. Dok se brinemo, mi zapravo maštamo i fantaziramo o budućnosti o kojoj ništa ne znamo, niti možemo da predvidimo. Dok se brinemo, mi zapravo vizualiziramo sve ono što ne želimo da nam se desi, čega se pribojavamo. Pri tome, u našem tjelu i tjelesnim sistemima aktiviramo iste reakcije kao da nam se to o čemu maštamo već dešava. Dok se brinemo mi zapravo stavljamo fokus na “tamo i onda”, odnosno izlazimo iz “sada i ovdje“ i vrlo brzo sami sebi kreiramo emocionalne reakcije i tjelesne senzacije koje nam ne služe.

Nadam se da vam je sada postalo jasno zašto bi bilo mudro izabrati da se ne brinete bez obzira na situaciju.

Ako ste nakon ovoga odlučili da zaista odustajete od brige, možda se pitate kako da to postignete?

Smatram da je ključno naučiti da se “uhvatite” kad počnete da brinete, odnosno, kada izađete iz sadašnjosti. Kako da naučite da uhvatite svoju misao? Najbolji način je meditacija. Meditacija je alat koji nam može pomoći da pratimo svoje misli, i da ih osvještavamo. Cilj meditacije je da nakon određenog vremena vježbanja postanemo meditativni u svakodnevnom životu. Na taj način možemo da naučimo i postanemo uvježbani da se “uhvatimo” čim nam naumpadne neka misao koja nam ne služi, te da je automatski i svjesno prekinemo. Kako? Tako što ćete promijeniti kanal. Kao što bi ga trebali promijeniti dok na TV-u gledate neki sadržaj koji vam se ne sviđa. Do vas je da uzmete taj daljinski i da promijenite kanal. Tako isto i epizodu koju ste kreirali u svom umu, čim se uhvatite da idete u neželjenom smjeru. Važno je da primijetite čim neželjena misao dođe (prema nekim istraživanjima u prvih 17 sekundi), jer ako nastavite razmišljati u negativnom smjeru, možete očekivati samo još takvih negativnih misli koje će se nadovezati na postojeće. Prema tome, učinite uslugu i sebi  i ljudima oko vas, naučite da meditirate i vježbajte svaki dan da postanete pažljivi svjedok svojih unutarnjih procesa. Vi apsolutno možete da prestanete da se brinete. Pišem iz vlastitog iskustva. Ako sam mogla ja, možete i vi. Sretno!

A lot of wisdom and life experience is woven into the popular proverb “Just don’t worry.” When you get this kind of advice from someone, maybe you think they don’t understand you and that they aren’t really sympathetic at all.

But this wise advice that we usually get from older and more experienced ones is in fact, a universal truth – worry will not help you to move farward. Not only that, but with worry we are progressively working against ourselves at all levels, starting with the physical (the stress hormones we produce because we worry further weaken our immune system) to the emotional and spiritual levels.

What is worry?

Worry is the worst possible way we use one phenomenal possibility that is inherent only in human beings – the ability to fantasize. As we worry, we actually fantasize about the future that we know nothing about, nor can we foresee. As we worry, we are actually visualizing everything we don’t want to happen to us. In doing so, we activate the same reactions in our body and body systems as if what we were imagining was already happening to us. While we worry, we actually focus on the “there and then”, that is, we exit the “here and now” and very quickly create for ourselves emotional reactions and bodily sensations that do not serve us.

I hope now it has become clear to you why it would be wise to choose not to worry no matter what the situation.

If, after this, you have decided to really give up worrying, you may be wondering how to achieve it?

I find it crucial to learn to “catch” yourself when you start worrying, that is, when you leave the present moment. How do you learn to capture your thought? The best way is meditation. Meditation is a tool that can help us keep track of our thoughts and make become aware of them. The goal of meditation is to become meditative in our daily lives after a certain amount of time. In this way, we can learn and become trained to catch a thought as soon as it strikes, and to automatically and consciously interrupt it. How? By changing the channel. Just like you should change it while watching some content you don’t like on TV. It’s up to you to take that remote and change the channel. You can do the same with the episode you created in your mind, as soon as you catch yourself going in an unwanted direction. It is important to notice as soon as the unwanted thought arrives (according to some research in the first 17 seconds), because if you continue to think in the negative direction, you can expect only more such negative thoughts to build on existing ones. Therefore, do yourself a favor and the people around you, learn to meditate and practice every day to become a careful witness to your inner processes. You absolutely can stop worrying. I write from my own experience. If I could, you can too. Good luck!

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